The Bits & Bytes Religion
Time for some Monday morning fun... These days we got so many religions, why not add another one? I give you the Bits & Bytes Religion!
Unlike a lot of the single god religions, this one is polytheist, like the old Greek Gods. It's a religion focused to the IT-business. Let's take a look at the gods.
God of Software Watches over every piece of software ever written, and being written at the moment. If you want to keep your software running and want to write quality software, pray to this one.
God of Hardware The guardian of all hardware related things. Responsible for your HD crashes, but also for nano-technology.
God of Users The 'simple' god. Responsible for the common knowledge and actions of all users. If you want users to get smart, ask him a favor.
God of Performance The Speed God. He knows to tweak every millisecond from a piece of software or hardware, but when you make him anger he can also take revenge by making everything run so slowly you decide to start over from scratch again.
God of Maintenance Also known as 'The Handyman'. Make him happy and you'll be able to fix everything you encounter. Make him angry and your life will be turned into a living maintenance hell.
God of Bugs Responsible for every bug ever created, but simultaneous also in charge of 'Luck'. You'll find yourself asking favors of him a lot, to prevent you from writing accidental bugs.
And the most important one:
God of Electricity! He who commands all other gods. Without him, there is nothing. Mostly he is a very caring god, but when he is angry, it's very very bad. Electricity outage, electrical interference. He can destroy hardware and bring every piece of software to a halt.
Now, on to the worshipping.
There's no need to go to a special building to worship them, or wear special clothes. The only thing they take into account is your motivation and happiness. When you create something and it works, be extremely happy, and when you are making something, try to make the best of it. Doing those things will please them, if you aren't motivated and you create something bad, they can get angry with you.
And here we are, a new religion :)